You know when you hire a tree removal service, and they rip out the electrical lines and damage your garage and roof? Well it was one of those days yesterday!
I was in the basement when I heard a loud crash, swearing, and then the power went out. I knew exactly what happened, as I previously suggested that they have the electric company drop the lines for them. They insisted they could work around it, but the guy's son made a mistake. People make mistakes.
I answered the knock at my door and looked past his shoulder to see some "interesting" damage:
Delightful! But things could have been so much worse. Thankfully the owner's son wasn't badly injured but he did have to make a visit to the hospital to make sure he didn't fracture anything. What I thought was interesting was that the father, out of anger and embarrassment, chose to hit his son on the way to the hospital. He also threatened to beat his son in the "wood shed if he ever pulls a stunt like this again." I don't know if the owner said all of this to me to make it appear as if he cared about the mistake, or if this is seriously how he resolves conflict and accidents with others. Which brings me to anger and those ugly feelings we all have arise on occasion.
I could have been enraged, furious, thrown my tea mug across the yard and made a huge scene threatening them. But why? What purpose would that action serve? The tree crew already knew their mistake, they knew what they did was not what a client wants, and so on. I accepted what happened and chose not to be angry, but to work with them on the solution. I think it put everyone at ease, and they were able to focus on more thorough means of resolving the damage.
Anger and violence are an odd reaction and a primal way of getting people to do something, or react in a certain way; to control someone or something. I've seen people try to beat their dog because they think somehow violence will register with the animal better, rather than using an effective training method like Cesar Milan's dog psychology method based on pack mentality. But let's take a step back further.
Why do we resort to violence? Violence and anger fails to convey the true reason behind our actions...that the father was afraid of his son being killed in that accident, that our feelings were deeply hurt, that we feel our boundaries are being violated, or that we're extremely frustrated. Instead of relaying those core issues and reasons, we resort to violence and anger. Violence and anger cuts short our experience and our message. It keeps relationships and people oppressed and elementary, it boasts of primitive and un-evolved times. Violence and anger are not effective. The only time they can be effective and useful is in self-defense.
And the even bigger question for me is, "Is the anger worth it?". It is really worth releasing such negative energy in such a irresponsible way? I once heard of a profound analogy about negative words, bullying, violence, and so on:
"Your body is like a piece of wood.
All those abusive comments,
violent experiences, and negative memories
are like nails driven into the wood.
You can remove the nails but
the holes still remain."
I've seen that it takes a lot more positive actions and energy to compensate for one small act of negativity. Why is that? Negativity seems to be so powerful, it is something we are physiologically wired to remember more than positive things, and it can be something we carry with ourselves for a long time.
...
I did a random act of kindness the other day (I try to do these often if it's within my power and means). I was at Ulta getting a few supplies so I could paint on my makeup and "beautify" myself, haha. While in the checkout line, a woman stood next to me at the counter juggling her baby and a wallet. She was asking the cashier if she could charge her credit card for a few cents as the item cost $8.75 or so, and she had exactly $8 in cash on her. She would have to unpack her whole backpack and baby carrier to get the card. I asked her if she needed change and the look on her face was pretty memorable.
"I might actually..." but she brushed off my comment as if I wasn't serious. I was in a hurry (thankfully time doesn't exist on the other side) and before the woman was into her checkout process, I passed her a dollar.
"Here's a dollar, will that cover it?" I asked, not knowing how much the total cost was.
"Oh my god! That is the nicest thing anyone has...thank you! I hope your good karma comes back to you! Thank you so much!" She exclaimed with a confused face.
I laughed, "I sure hope so! The last two years have been a nightmare...but it'll get better soon! Have a good day!"
To me it was just a dollar...the same value as four quarters; Something I could find quickly in a parking lot, under my couch, etc. but for her it meant a lot more and was something she needed at the time. She muttered to the cashier as I was leaving that she never had anyone do something generous like that for her. In my head I kept thinking, "It's only a dollar..." but was grateful it impacted her like that.
Now...had someone come up to her in a different scenario and said something hurtful like, "Look lady, we've got people waiting in line here - we don't have all day! If you can't afford it, get the hell out of the store!" The result would be much different! I honestly believe that those negative experiences stick with people more deeply during their day. Why? We feel bad, we run over the experience in our head and what we should have said or done, and so on. Whereas with a positive experience we go about our day happily, and some of us might even try to pay it forward, but we don't focus on it like with negative events.
So where am I going with this rant and what is the moral of the story? I'm not really sure :) but basically I'd like to see the world behave in a much more compassionate, loving, and understanding way...I think we would make a lot more progress than currently!
Think about the wooden holes in you. What painful memories or traumas do you carry with you? Are you ready to forgive and release? Take a moment to visualize your liver and abdomen being washed over with a beautiful healing green light, filling in any of the holes others have left in you. Followed by a soothing blue light enveloping your body. Practice this daily or especially after you've encountered someone or something that has hurt you.
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Please be responsible with your energy. Do not "dump" your emotions and psychic energy on other people. Vent if you need to, but don't take it out on others if you're in a bad mood. Go forth and conquer my readers! Send out good vibes, love, and light to others. If you encounter someone who is being poopy, envision a brick wall between you and them in your mind and surround yourself in white light :)
Light & Love to you all,
~Samantha~
I am trying to mentally prepare myself for the possibility that my beloved family member might not be around for very long. He is like a grandfather figure to me and unfortunately has a very aggressive form of prostrate cancer. I have known him my entire life and am grateful for the last decade or so of time that I've gotten to spend with him and the family. As his dementia progressed he became much more docile, loving, and relaxed. He has always been eccentric but that is why I love him.
I put up the Christmas tree and decorations last night with my boyfriend. It's only November 12th! Usually I wait until after Thanksgiving to decorate...but I want the house to look as cozy and charming as possible for when he comes to visit.
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