Hey everyone! Happy holidays, Merry Christmas, happy new year, etc.!
This posting is going to get a little bit deep, philosophical, or even "fruity" lol...so buckle up or put on your scuba gear! ;) Sometimes I'll be in quiet contemplation when all of a sudden a quote, lecture or concept comes into my head. It could be my imagination but it's often an "external source" if that makes sense? Often it is when I am hurting or trying to understand something...hence why I suspect it might be from the Divine - almost a way of comforting me. It'll be a concept that I previously did not hold, or a philosophy I never considered and BOOM it comes rushing in. Usually I'll write it down and I've considered putting these into a book but usually I end up writing blogs like this. So! "Alone" or "Loneliness"... Sometimes the holiday season has people feeling down or alone. But what is "feeling alone"? Hopeless? Left out? Abandoned? Isolated? Depressed? "Alone" is a falsehood and is only a feeling. When we bring in a spiritual aspect, we are never alone. We are not alone on this planet or in this universe. We are surrounded by one another and by the Divine, whether people see this truth or not. Our only problem is if we don't allow ourselves to reach out - when we choose to be blind to reality. We block ourselves from reaching out to others and to Spirit, often out of fear, giving up hope, or a false belief that no one understands or is there for us. Alone is a lie and quite possibly of the "dark side's" telling. (Oh no, here she's goes again about good vs. evil, ha...)
If you're not religious or spiritual (there is a difference), it may seem that "alone" is factual and truth. But I assure you it is not! Alone is really existing without God, in a sense. No, I wasn't brainwashed as a child to believe in the Divine, and I have wandered outside of religion to question truths...but only to come back to my beliefs with more certainty. I've seen and experienced so many things that validate my belief in "the beyond" through 16+ years of research in metaphysics. It's hard to take someone's word, like mine, as "true" when someone hasn't experienced these things, but I'm trying to "report back" to the population that there is something to it. Our world extends way beyond what we see and experience. Whether you believe in God or not, I think the teachings of Jesus and others are profound and admirable. These "messengers" were here to let us know that life continues, that God is real and is a part of each and every one of us. They taught about Love.
Yes, we can be physically "alone" but that is only in a physical, earthly sense. You can be alone in your home but your neighbors are nearby, you have family and friends, and loved ones that are available. Even your pets are there for you with their love! Being alone almost seems like a choice....a mindset. If you're feeling alone, are you choosing to do so? What could you do to change this situation?
Unfortunately, there are some souls who live a lonely existence. They have no family or friends, but at some point we have to be responsible for our isolation. If you're alone this holiday season, reach out. Perhaps volunteer at a shelter, connect with other people, and embrace the "food" that being with others can nourish you with. Sometimes we need to recharge our spiritual batteries, so to speak. And spending time with others can do just that! The holidays are about spending time with our loved ones, about being appreciative and giving love.
Love can cure "alone". Love is all encompassing, limitless, and powerful. Love is essentially God. I'm not talking about some bearded man on a golden throne casting judgement upon you. ;) But the essence of God. Great Spirit is pure love and light. It is a part of everything and we all hold a piece of this Source within ourselves. We can directly connect to this love. The opposite of "loneliness" is "aloneness"...So what does aloneness mean? Well kiddies....here you go! ;)
So I want to discuss feeling "alone" and from what I've observed working in the paranormal field, as I think it's rather fascinating in the way it seems to verify that "alone" is really from the dark side of the spiritual spectrum. It's dark in nature and seems to not be of the divine.
I'm not asking you to believe in "demons" but from the demonic cases I've worked on there is a common denominator. "Isolation" or being alone. These entities perpetuate isolation in various ways. It is their goal. They strive to make someone feel alone and helpless; they encourage people to become alone emotionally, physically, and spiritually. They break down individuals, families, relationships, and so on. They often influence people behind the scenes, unseen and unannounced. Hence why actual "demonic hauntings" are rare - they don't want to be known. It's a lot easier to influence people when they don't know demons are there, versus when they do know demons are present and what they are...or what they represent. They specialize in "lies" essentially..."I'm not hurting anyone if I have another drink and indulge my alcoholism", "it's just porn and I'm not addicted", "no one is there for me, I'm completely alone", "God isn't real, otherwise all these bad things in the world wouldn't happen" and so on...They often influence and create the bad things we see in this world. People are not born evil, but people make certain choices...Thankfully there is science now that proves such things are harmful to ourselves and others. I hope that, if not through spiritual awareness, through science, people will make better choices in their life.
Which brings me to another interesting connection... Out of all the near death experiences (NDE's) reported, 98% of people reported going to a wonderful, amazing place full of light and love. They reported seeing loved ones, and sometimes entirely new people that were of divine nature. But there was a small percentage, roughly 2% that reported a horrific experience...some would claim this to be "Hell". But it wasn't a hell in which we're taught...fire and brimstone. It was actually a complete disconnect from God and of being isolated or alone. There was no light, no one there, and an absolute isolation. Almost like a blackhole or solitary confinement.
Even more interesting is that when these people cried out or began to wish they were removed of this place, they began to "ascend" and began connecting with the divine.
Who knows what Hell is and if it exists, but if Heaven and Hell do exist and our God is a loving one...it makes sense that Hell wouldn't be some damning place where devils probe you with fiery pitch forks...it's rather a state of existing without God. God will leave you to your vices and freedom of choice, he/she/it will not interfere with your life. But if you reach out and ask for love, light, guidance, and so on...God will reciprocate. If you're unsure about your beliefs, ask for a "sign". Be open and be sincere. Also be patient...God doesn't work on billboards, although I wish it did! :) So whether it's through jealousy, hate, anger, lust, or other negative feelings...don't allow yourself to be isolated and alone. And don't allow these things to isolate others through your actions. Give love and be loved. As is everything in this world and beyond, things are cyclical and the law of attraction and reciprocity is abundant. Give and you shall receive. This holiday season, give love and company...and be grateful! :)
Always be yourself...that way your true friends, soulmate, and life's work can find you! Align with your soul and you'll find your true path.
There is a lot of clutter in our lives: jobs, advertising and the media, people, material items, and more. We're constantly bombarded by marketing messages (that are quiet often unhealthy), false ideas or goals, people who seek to use and abuse...the list goes on. Unfortunately, we get lost in this clutter all too often. And it's hard not to! Some of the clutter we have to incorporate in our lives to survive...but what clutter is blocking you from finding your true self? Your life's purpose and soul path?
What the heck is a soul path, Sam? Some of my readers know I've been researching and investigating the metaphysics and paranormal for over 16 years...and from what I've gathered, each and every person on this planet has a "soul path". A series of karmic lessons and "callings" they are to experience during their time on this floating ball of dirt and water. From near death experiences, psychics and mediums, visions, conversations with the "other side"...there is a general consensus that we apparently choose what to experience in our incarnation. But we do not remember this list once we're alive down here otherwise that would ruin the surprise of living! And we experience these things to further evolve our souls...to truly walk in different shoes each lifetime. We get to taste it all - the good and the bad. There is now indisputable evidence of past lives...a man even served time in prison for a murder he committed related to a past life. The murder victim incarnated, and as a child was able to recall the location of the murder weapon, where the body was, and was able to identify and locate the murderer. Sounds crazy right? Well it happens all around the world...if this interests you, I recommend reading "Children's Past Lives" by Carol Bowman.
So what is your purpose this lifetime? Consider yourself a detective. We're all trying to make sense out of this world and to find our place in it. Our paths are usually never straight - they wind, change directions, and sometimes loop around if we haven't learned a specific lesson, and so on. One of the best things we can do is identify if we're not on our life path. Are you involved in an unhealthy relationship, are your unhappy and feeling unfulfilled, are you working in a field that you're not passionate about, do you feel stuck living in a certain place?
What are you passionate about? Passions exist for a reason and they are a clue towards your true path. Follow your heart whether it be a hobby, a creative class, a new job, moving to a new city, etc. When you follow those "hunches" and inclinations, it's also your intuition working for you! When you begin spending time doing things you love...you're going to meet and attract people on the same "wavelength"...and thus you're going to find true friends, soulmates, and work that rings true to your soul. When we're busy doing jobs and things we don't like, we're reducing the chances of running into such people and places. You're basically in hiding, and it's very hard for the universe and Divine to help you when you're in hiding. But once you start following those passions, you're truly finding yourself.
So should you drop everything and run away? No, but start planning. Set a vision board, set goals, imagine what you want your life to be like and make it happen. You can create your destiny and your reality. Travel, get out of your comfort zone, and meet new people! Light & Love to you all!
Long time no...write? Or read? Either way, good to spend time with you readers again!
So often my blog contains happy-diddies and observations on how to live a happy life, etc. In the end, this posting does offer insight on how to avoid darkness. But today I decided to use this space to write about a paranormal case that many people on Facebook asked me to write about. I could be a jerk and tell you all to wait for a sequel to my published book "Fighting Malevolent Spirits" but alas I will write about it here :) ...and include more in the book if I write the sequel...I've started it but haven't taken on many cases in the last year so I could keep my sanity. This line of work takes a toll on your mind, body, and soul to say the least.
As some of you know I work on severe hauntings and/or demonic hauntings...some coined the term "demonologist" for my line of work and it's a helpful term but doesn't include all of what I do. Essentially, I do spiritual counseling, healing, work as a minister to remove the haunting, and on two occasions have dealt with what some call an "exorcism". Many Westerners believe exorcism is only performed under the Catholic umbrella, but really demons and exorcisms are a global, multi-cultural phenomenon. And there are multiple methods. I share these experiences in my book, on Facebook, and with others not for some "publicity" stunt (I've turned down numerous TV show offers mind you), but to relay back to readers and friends that..."Hey, this stuff is real. I've been investigating it, witnessed things...and there is good and evil in the world." It reminds me of in The Exorcism of Emily Rose, where she states, "How can people deny God, when I show them the devil?" And that is my purpose. To help those in need and to educate others that there is something to this...
So! The Alpena, Michigan case...
If you've read my book you'll know that before a client contacts me about a demonic case, I always have some sort of premonition or psychic dream that confirms what I'm about to deal with. In the times I didn't have such dreams or warnings, the case turned out not to be demonic. I like to think this "radar" is pretty accurate now! :) Prior to "Marie" contacting me I had another nightmare, or premonition. I dreamt (I like to use the British word dreamt...sounds better than dreamed) that I was with some younger woman...in her early 20's, dark hair, dark eyes, and I had her in a headlock (which I would never do) with my arms as I commanded the entities inside her to name themselves. She was possessed. The dream further illustrated this by showing me her wandering into traffic, nearly being hit by cars. Other foul images were shared and I awoke from the dream. I figured I was just having another nightmare, but didn't realize it was connected to a future case. Most dreams I have are battling with the demon or entity directly...not a possession or exorcism.
Marie is 25 years old, is a brunette with brown eyes. Her friend Stacy reached out to me saying she was concerned there was a demonic haunting going on and a possible possession. I found out later Marie was also having a reoccurring nightmare that she walks out to the mailbox and then is hit by a car. There seemed to be some similarities to my dream. Could also be coincidence.
Five years ago to the day that Ron and I visited with Marie, her husband died in a car accident. He was killed by a drunk driver. After his death Marie struggled with severe depression and attempting to numb her pain. She would often spend time lying next to his grave in the cemetery and "bitter" feelings towards God began creeping in. I frequently see people lose faith in God when something horrible happens here on earth...but people should remember there is freedom of choice down here - meaning both good and evil are among us. And we have this dynamic so that we can learn and develop our souls while on earth. We are here to learn - even if it is painful.
While at the cemetery, Marie felt a presence by her. She thought perhaps it was her deceased husband, Jim. Then she began to feel the spirit tug on her pant legs as if it were a small child. Marie informed us that she also said "stupid things" to the presence like, "Oh you're going to follow me now? You're going to come home with me apparently?" which may have also opened an opportunity for the entity to attach itself. In Marie's attempt to ward off this presence, it may have grown closer to her.
Marie eventually had her son, Evan, who is now four years old. A few months ago Marie, Evan, and her current boyfriend Eric moved into their current home. Within that first week little "odd things" would happen and everyone brushed it off. Then things began to progress. Eric has his own history of traumas and pain. There were also difficulties in their relationship but they were strong and worked through these together. However, it was a perfect breeding ground for a demonic entity, and is a dynamic I see in almost every demonic haunting. There is always pain and trauma, or vulnerabilities.
Evan started having an "imaginary friend" he would play with. This friend would tell Evan that his mom was going to die and he had to push her so she would hit her head. Evan would play with his trucks and Marie witnessed the trucks moving on their own when Evan was playing with his "friend". This friend would also be "scared" and hide while Marie's friend Stacy tried to perform a house blessing.
Stacy's husband came over to mow the lawn for Marie one day. While getting the lawn mower ready in the garage, Mike heard what sounded like a sledge hammer demolishing the house inside. No one was home. As he mowed by the front window he had an uncontrollable urge to keep looking in the window. He saw three, "reptilian-looking" fingers pull the curtains aside. Mike tried to remain calm but as soon as Marie and Stacy returned, he held back tears and left the house. "I didn't feel right, something was weird when I was there alone and then I saw it." He had also seen a hunched over figure through the curtains while mowing behind the house.
Marie witnessed Evan being scratched by the entity, which left an iconic mark of three scratches, as if the entity had claws. Marie had an experience while laying down in the living room where she felt a heavy weight on her chest and saw two red dots above her face. Marie believed these may have been eyes but could barely focus while struggling to breathe. Fights were increasing in the household and on one occasion Eric went into an angry tirade. The entity was influencing everyone and feeding off of their negative energy. Stacy convinced Marie to perform a house blessing with her after contacting me.
Stacy led the blessing and while they were in the midst of the blessing, Marie began throwing up and "blacked out". She also listed three demonic names as Stacy commanded the entities to name themselves. Marie had no recollection of this and it became evident that Marie may be struggling with possession. Marie's phone screensaver then changed to an image of a demon...one of which she listed during the blessing. No one had touched her phone and was seemingly impossible. While they were in the house they heard growling and laughter in the garage. Then there was the sound of a baby crying coming from a room in which they kept a baby changing station. Evan also heard this and made remarks. At around 3:00 a.m. Marie believes she had a possible miscarriage. Demonic entities are terrible, have no remorse and often prey on animals and things that bring us joy...such as a child.
Prior to our visit I instructed Marie to say prayers and ignore the entity until we could come perform the blessing and deliverance. One evening Marie put Evan to bed and was unsure of what prayers to say so she recited the "As I lay me down to sleep..." prayer for Evan. Later that evening while people were over the TV surround sound system turned on. It somehow connected to Youtube and began blasting "Enter Sandman" by Metallica. Which some of you may know has parts of that prayer in it. They turned it off but it kept coming back on and playing.
Finally Sunday arrived and we pulled into the driveway. I purchased a toy truck for Evan because he didn't want to lose his "friend", and I felt this would be a good bribing tool to get him to say goodbye to the demon. I felt an oppressive feeling in the house but nothing strong...often entities will hide while I am at the home. We sat and talked for awhile and then began the blessing. A nervous and angry energy began building up in the home as I prepared the items for the blessing. Eric agreed he was "on board" with the blessing but I was unsure of his commitment. When I walked into the house to first meet him, he laid on the couch and didn't seemed enthralled by our visit, refusing to get up. I shook his hand and eventually made him feel comfortable, however I suspected his faith wasn't entirely there, but I understood why. His entire family was devoutly religious which turned him off - I understood his feelings towards organized religion but it also left him with a negative bias towards the blessing we were going to perform. I only asked that he believe in a higher power and to call upon that divine being while we did the blessing...I hoped he was true to his word. If a client isn't 150% on board with the blessing or their faith in God, I cannot guarantee the blessing will work. Out of the two cases I had fail, it was due to all the family members not being present for a blessing and the other was due to a son's unwillingness to call upon the divine as he dabbled with darker things.
The blessing flowed smoothly but I did not feel the entity leave. I asked Evan where his friend was. He was reluctant to tell me. "Where is your friend, Evan?" Evan looked away and said, "In the stones..." I thought to myself, what stones? Under the house? In the yard? "Where are the stones, Evan?" "In mommy..." I got up and went into the kitchen and asked if Marie was wearing any jewelry, seeing as the "stones" could have been gem stones, kidney stones, etc. At that moment, Stacy informed me that she had just placed crystals and healing stones in Marie's hand. There is no way Evan could have known that. The entity seemed to be showing off its telepathic abilities, which many demons have. I don't think there was anything wrong with the stones...in fact the demon may have disliked these crystals and stones due to the fact they absorb negative energy.
I knew coming to the case that we might have to resort to an exorcism, it was something that I held in the back of my mind. During our counseling Ron and I saw Marie's eyes change. They darkened and she glared in anger. Marie felt nauseous and had a variety of emotions during the house blessing; anger, sadness, hopelessness, and so on. It was now time for us to focus on her. I had a much easier time jumping out of a helicopter this summer than I did with beginning an exorcism. I had been involved in a case before that included an unexpected pseudo-exorcism but never have I engaged in a full on exorcism. People are taught that only Catholic priests and exorcisms ordained by the Bishop are successful and allowed - it is a belief based on fear. However, I act based on the principles that Jesus taught..."Go and cast out demons." is what he instructed to his followers. He didn't send them to a ministry, he didn't give them specific prayers, and he certainly didn't make his followers have their exorcisms approved by someone first. The issues I see in this are that many people do not receive the bishop's permission and they are refused help. I have a problem with this.
Acting on my faith, and with over 15 years of research and nine years of working on demonic cases, I began the exorcism. I have fought with these entities since I was 17, I knew how they worked but this time it was inside of someone and not inside the house. I knew the steps and had the rites of exorcism before me. What I found interesting is that when I recited the rites, Marie had no reactions...but when I put the book down and preached what I know to be truths about God, Jesus, and the angels she would vomit and contort. I was distracted by reciting, but when I set the book down and spoke from my heart with conviction it seemed to upset the entity. I reached out my hand over Marie and a bolt of energy shot through me, which I can only describe as the Divine. I was trembling with adrenaline but then a calm but powerful presence over took me and I began praying over her in such a rapid succession I had no idea what I was going to say next but it just kept coming out. It was like "word vomit" but of the divine. I anointed her with holy water that my sister had given me. She brought back holy water from the House of the Virgin Mary in Turkey. We joked that it would be for "a Megatron Demon" and for worst case scenarios...I felt I needed it for this occasion and blessed Marie with it. Ron and Stacy pointed out that Marie had formed a rash on her forehead. It was a red rash on her skin in the sign of the cross where I had been placing the holy water. I anointed her forehead, mouth, and chest repeatedly during the deliverance. Guttural groans came from Marie and at one point she began choking, saying it felt like something was in her chest/throat.
I saw Marie's body contort; her toes curled in a way that I thought she was missing half of her big toe but realized she was writhing from the entity. Her fingers curled and her leg kept coming up under the table. She was sweating, vomiting, drooling, groaning, but nothing like you see in the movies. I continued with the exorcism and asked that everyone place their hands over her in love and pray. More vomiting happened. When we invoked Gabriel the Archangel she would vomit a lot. An hour and a half of this passed and I kept checking in with Marie when she would "come to" from her blackouts. Finally there was a release. I felt a change in the house. Right before this same moment, Evan had told Eric where his "friend" was. Eric and Mike went to that room and commanded the entity to leave. They came back to the kitchen where we were performing the exorcism and I felt the release. Marie had a lightness about her and everyone's mood changed. Eric and Marie cuddled and were affectionate with each other, no longer fighting and angry like during the counseling. Marie explained that she felt something in her chest/throat leave, like a huge blockage and weight was removed. Evan said, "Mommy okay now, good job." He stated that his friend was gone. I was relieved but still held my breath as there was a long road ahead for Eric and Marie...they desperately needed counseling otherwise the entity could come back.
As we packed up our belongings I kept informing them on how to keep the entity away. Two days went by and everything was wonderful according to Marie. I later received an email from Marie that Eric came back home one night in an angry tirade. Eric had possibly opened a door again and the entity was now attaching itself to him. I remember seeing him trail off during our warfare prayer and didn't seem to be committed to removing the entity...He laughed and joked during most of our time at the home which is often a reaction from being nervous and something I understand. Marie's possession had been removed, and the house was cleared of the entity's presence but it seemed it was now bothering Eric. Evan cried and said, "He's back, mommy. And he's scaring me." The "friend" was now showing it's true colors to Evan through Eric. Eric started counseling that Friday and we hope to perform an exorcism on Eric once he is stable and willing...without his permission and willingness to remove the attachment I can't do anything. It likely would be in vain and unsuccessful. It is also possible that Eric will be able to remove the entity himself through a change in lifestyle, spirituality, and mindset. Marie and Evan left to stay safe at her mother's, free from oppression and possession and eventually returned home. I pray that Eric will be successful with counseling and we can proceed with liberating everyone for good.
Update (10/21/15): Things have calmed down in the house and it appears the entity is gone but Marie is still on guard (which is good). She is using a Himalayan salt rock lamp to keep the home inhospitable for the entity. Eric is doing online counseling and Evan is doing well. Evan has mentioned playing with a friend but his behavior is now benevolent and happy, and the "friend" is not sinister in nature...likely a normal imaginary friend. We're are extremely happy to hear that!
Fear & Loving...yes, it kind of sounds like a play-on of Fear & Loathing in Las Vegas. But it can sometimes surprise us when fear and love go hand in hand...At least I didn't realize it was fear. (Fun Fact: I listened to this song while I wrote...)
"You know, I'm tired of people being scared of getting hurt. Boo-hoo, get over it. Everyone get's hurt. So put yourself out there, take the risk, and live your life otherwise you'll miss out!" I've heard myself say similar things to friends and family, lending my "advice" as if I followed it too. I used to! It truly annoyed me how some people would rather live under a rock than risk their heart on the line...and yet I find myself a hypocrite again. *sarcastic applause*
I was confident I had tackled and mastered that karmic lesson...Learning to give love freely and letting love come into my life. Giving and receiving love, taking risks, and putting my heart out there. I am extremely warm and loving to almost everyone I meet, and always keep the good vibes flowing; it's something I enjoy doing. And yet I am greedy with my deeper heart these days I realized; not wanting to give it to anyone because sometimes I feel there isn't much left of it :/ I jokingly imagine some pathetic, and slightly brown, glob of ground-round meat, wrapped in Saran-Wrap with a name tag that reads, "Hello my name is, _Heart ". And that's my heart. ;) Charming! It's beat up and should probably retire from the shelf, ha.
In other circumstances my heart is strong, massive, and beats with the pride of an African drum - putting myself out there to help others, defending, and acting with courage. But with "intimacy" love my heart rotates like one of those hidden bookcase doors and the "love" side looks a bit funky. I don't know when this really started but I know the reasons why. Those reasons are the packing twine I keep around my hamburger-meat-of-a-heart and they are limiting, cumbersome, and tiring. And I didn't realize they were still there for the last several years, but now I see them. Now I get to cut them away. The same karmic lesson has come back to haunt me. "Ghost of Karmic Lessons Past" ;) I often see us repeating patterns until we break them and learn from them. So, it looks like I have to redo this exam once and for all.
Sometimes I'll let my true feelings and heart show, but it's brief and fleeting usually. Kind of like some weird version of "peek-a-boo" just to test the waters and see where the other person is at. This is one of those occasions where I hate being a Scorpio (yes we're going to bring up astrology again). We have this crusty and tough outer shell but inside we're "gooey" (check out the Glass Animals song called Gooey), extremely sensitive and love deeper than any of the other signs. We go to the depths of the ocean with feelings and are the most loyal. But that damn exoskeleton is the bane of my existence. I sometimes scare people off, and most unfortunately, I have pushed people away...people who showed me love.
Push. Pull. Repeat. Was this my attachment style as a child? I know us Millenials have a really messed up fashion of dating these days, as discussed in this great article, but what has been wrong with me the last several years? I understand that sociopath brainwashing, infidelity, and abandonment from multiple sources can do a Whopper on someone (we're continuing the burger theme haha) but logically I can see past it. My conscious brain is at peace with the matter, so I shouldn't be having this problem, right? Either my heart or subconscious (maybe both) still seems to have a hard time trusting others and accepting love. Why? Why do people push others away? Because of fear. I also think I do it as a survival and preservation technique sometimes. If you follow this blog (you should!) you've seen my previous posts about how fear holds us back and boy, does it ever.
We're afraid to be abandoned, to lose someone, to love and have love so wonderful that it's a nightmare and horrifying to risk losing it. This post discusses how this fear stems back to our childhood and how we have to make a conscious effort to break those patterns we learned as children. Easier said than done right? And what's even more tricky...is if those patterns were reinforced in your adult life. Break those patterns and those chains that bind you.
But let's not sound like Eeyore, and instead, focus on the moral here (yes, get to the point Sam). Love is an amazing thing. Really, it's the only thing in this world worth fighting and living for. What a horrible existence we would have if we lived in a world without love...it would be Hell, literally. Think about it! I find that the divine is love, and on the opposite side of the spectrum you have absolute absence of love. So! Love is probably the most important thing in this world, I think. It's a solution, it's a salve, a way of life, and a practice. Love is awesome!
So what can you do if you're a bit frosty and have been through some horrible things? One thing you can try is doing a chakra-balancing meditation (free on Youtube) and focus on the heart chakra. If you're still skeptical about "chakras" or "meridians" they've actually proven these energy centers exist in our bodies (dye pooled to these energy lines despite the dye being injected in muscles and not veins). Step two? Forgive. This one is really hard sometimes, especially if the offender really excels at being an a-hole ;) But! You need to do it. You don't have to forget, but try and forgive in a basic sense. Forgiveness is giving yourself permission to move on with your life and to not forget the hurt, but to no longer let it affect you.
One final suggestion is that you can heal your heart and "what has been taken" from your heart...by actually giving more. It seems contradictory. You may feel you have very little left to give, so why give away more? Because love is an energy that cannot be created or destroyed...we transfer it and it flows like a fluid between souls. Start the chain reaction by giving a little love and you'll receive love, if not for the Law of Attraction as well. Start small if you must, but practice the art of giving and receiving. You can begin with minute gestures such as holding the door for someone, waving at the UPS guy, or giving a compliment. Eventually you can work your way up to bigger and more grand gestures, but monitor your happiness and heart during this journey. You'll notice you're healing yourself and others by giving them love. Essentially that is what reiki is too (healing with energy and your hands)! We all could use some extra love in our daily lives, so get out there and share it!
Love can thaw and heat up even the coldest of people...and if you're lucky you can get hot enough to fry up some old hamburger meat before it spoils from the shelf ;). Someone special has been knocking on my "heart-door" lately...I've progressed from yelling "Who is it?!?!", to peeking through the eye-hole, to cracking the door open, and now I'm moving on to opening it all the way and welcoming in their love with open arms.
I've been thinking about you guys and this blog...it has been a complete zoo! I apologize for my delay...and for my future delay. I'll probably be packed until mid July but I will try to get some postings put together for you guys. I don't know if it's because of Mercury retrograde but people have been coming out of the woodwork asking for help, people from my past, people using and mooching...it get's overwhelming sometimes. Eventually you end up feeling drained by them and just want to hide under a rock or explode on them. But! I enjoy helping...just not when too many people all need help at the same time, such as currently. Boundaries are healthy and good to practice! :)
So guess what? I'm creating a really awesome, hopefully viral, video about my adventures in Traverse City! I've got Odesza willing to license music for the video, skydiving, helicopters, parasailing, wake surfing, etc. I think you will all be pleased :) I'm going to compile all the different footage into one 3-4 minute video that's full of adrenaline, romance, adventure, beauty, and more! So yesterday, with only 30 minutes of sleep, I went skydiving...here is a video I made of just the skydiving footage:
Enjoy!
Make sure to share, like, comment, and subscribe! :) Help me make this video a big success!
So if you find someone's eyelash baked onto your cereal...do you still blow it away and make a wish? ;) Gross. I had an awesome weekend with two good friends that came up to Traverse City from out of town. I'd have to say one of my favorite pastimes is having a bonfire and sharing stories. Sure we talked about some of our friends we have lost to death way too early, but it is beautiful and healing to be able to talk about our deceased loved ones. We laughed about the fact that some New Yorkers were puzzled at the concept of having a bonfire..."So, you burn wood and stare at it all night?" they asked my friend. Ha! Too funny. It's actually about the time spent with one another, telling stories, playing music, and so on. And yes...we watch the fire as it is mesmerizing! :)
Good morning! With all the loss in my life over the last 3+ years I have taken time to reflect on what to do with it all...All too often life seems to be filled with loss, death, goodbyes, and so on. It would seem to function as a vacuum in our life right? But are we taking the time, more so making the time, to start new beginnings, 'hellos', and creative births? To view these events as a new door opening? A fresh chapter in our life?
I think we get stuck in cyclical thinking or focused on the negative aspects of a situation (because it is painful), rather than appreciating the value and positive facets. This is also a great "coping mechanism"; focusing on the positive and not the negative when things get difficult in our life...it could even tie in with the Law of Attraction that we've discussed before in previous posts.
I think we have to be held accountable to a certain degree for how much growth, newness, and positivity we create and welcome in our lives. If there has been a long list of losses and death, I do feel it is up to us to try and pick ourselves up, invite into our existence new experiences, and to make the best of what we have left.
It is SO easy to take the dark and "bad path"...to start an addiction, to let ourselves fall apart, to give into depression, temptation, anger, etc. But it is much more difficult to fight that pain, sadness, or whatever you're going through and to rise from your ashes like a phoenix and shine brightly :) That is tricky to pull off...but you can do it!
So how do you do it? Everyone is going to have their own path, method, or techniques...just like with spirituality :) But! Daily affirmations are a good start for most people! Try putting sticky notes each day where you will see them with a positive saying or goal on them. What about doing this for other people? :) I'm a "giver" by nature, so I love making others happy...gives me a spiritual high I think.
Visualization and meditation techniques are also extremely helpful. In our new Youtube channel ("Spirit Squad" which is humor + spiritual) with Cait Lewis (@FindCait) and myself, we discuss how to "ground & balance" ourselves with visualizing and meditation. Don't forget to "like" and subscribe...it's brand new, but once we get 500+ subscribers I can make a custom URL to make marketing easier, ha. Thank you!
So if you've been facing some dead-ends, loss, death, and so on...focus on your goals and positive outcomes...envision them happening and coming true! See yourself completing these tasks with success! And push yourself out the front door and get to work ;) Creation doesn't just fall into your lap...you have to make it happen. Go meet new people, try new places, travel, create something artistic, write, and so on. Whatever creative seeds you would like to grow, plant them now and tend to them :)
Did you know you can receive notifications for when I post a new posting to this blog? You didn't?!? Well! Now you know! Sign up with your email in the column to the right at the very top if you like this blog.
Also enjoy this video my friend showed me last night, ha ha!
I hope all of you are enjoying the springtime thus far! I have been running around like a chicken with its head cut off, but finally found time to sit down and write for you guys! :)
There are three gnomes on this tea mug, each one at a different height...but all are staring at me, "What are you going to write about next?" ;) My sister always gets me the coolest gifts!
“The most beautiful
people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering,
known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths.
These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding
of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving
concern. Beautiful people do not just happen.” ~ Elisabeth Kübler-Ross
Read more at: http://fractalenlightenment.com/34245/life/five-of-the-worst-ways-to-be-an-empath | FractalEnlightenment.com
“The most beautiful
people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering,
known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths.
These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding
of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving
concern. Beautiful people do not just happen.” ~ Elisabeth Kübler-Ross
Read more at: http://fractalenlightenment.com/34245/life/five-of-the-worst-ways-to-be-an-empath | FractalEnlightenment.com
“The most beautiful
people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering,
known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths.
These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding
of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving
concern. Beautiful people do not just happen.” ~ Elisabeth Kübler-Ross
Read more at: http://fractalenlightenment.com/34245/life/five-of-the-worst-ways-to-be-an-empath | FractalEnlightenment.com
“The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen.” ~ Elisabeth Kübler-Ross
“The most beautiful
people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering,
known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths.
These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding
of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving
concern. Beautiful people do not just happen.” ~ Elisabeth Kübler-Ross
Read more at: http://fractalenlightenment.com/34245/life/five-of-the-worst-ways-to-be-an-empath | FractalEnlightenment.com
“The most beautiful
people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering,
known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths.
These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding
of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving
concern. Beautiful people do not just happen.” ~ Elisabeth Kübler-Ross
Read more at: http://fractalenlightenment.com/34245/life/five-of-the-worst-ways-to-be-an-empath | FractalEnlightenment.com
It's a little earlier than normal for me...likely because I exercised a bunch the last two days. I woke up at 4 a.m. this morning, super sore but with a decent amount of energy...odd, because I am usually exhausted. Why? There's plenty of theories but I think the biggest one of all is being an empath and not practicing distancing myself or turning "off" this weird ability. That and autoimmune junk, hooray! More often than not I feel drained and burnt out by life. But I am working at improving things! Currently I am reading a great book called "The Empowered Empath" by Rosetree. I like her writing style and eventually I'll get to the parts on how to turn off the intuition more.
Intuitive gifts are usually viewed as a "burden" or as a "gift"; depending on the person and their experiences with it in life so far. But! All are gifts - it is how we use it and discipline it that matters. Of course you'll find some insane extremists who will say such gifts are of the devil and clearly haven't read the holy scripture that they so solemnly swear by (Corinthians explains), but eventually when they're in spirit on the other side, all will be explained to them. ;)
As an empath you can take away people's pain, depression, anger...sometimes I take on their emotions and it makes me ill. I can channel divine energy into someone and heal them early of an illness...often without their knowing, or I may then become sick with their ailment if I don't clear myself properly. Many people subconsciously enjoy "dumping" their energy on empaths because they often feel recharged, energized, or healed after dealing with an empath...likely because they unloaded their problems and negative energy onto that person.
***
As a small child I was painfully shy - a common trait for some empaths. I would hide behind my mother's leg, suck on my thumb, and stare up at people with huge blue eyes full of reticence. Leg = safety = I'm not moving from this leg of safety. Or at least I am sure that was my thought process. Even when I was born I didn't cry, but just stared at everyone in the room...."Oh shit...what is this place?!? Put me back!"
I did have a phase of flirting as a little kid though. :/ I would pick some people as my victims of beguilement in a restaurant booster chair, but mostly I was very shy up until middle school into early college years. During my social butterfly times, I was in love with meeting new people, getting out, traveling the world, concerts, and more. Then things became overwhelming for me - my life contracted and I felt the urge to withdraw from the world again. Going to the mall or grocery store was overwhelming because my intuition became extremely loud and people would drain me of my energy. Often times, I would have someone explain their life-story or personal woes to me in the checkout line...I would think to myself, "I didn't ask for this! I just wanted to pick up some eggs and salad..." but easier said than done. "My son died last week. I feel numb but sometimes..." and along with their story I actually felt their pain and sadness. If they were hurting, I was hurting. People would tell me things that actually affected me way more than they realized. The moods and energy of people would imprint upon me or affect me until I got home to cleanse myself of their "cords". This was a daily battle!
With so many people being spiritually unaware, spiritually imbalanced, and spiritually irresponsible every day in the world...is it a wonder why I started to prefer staying at home with my animals? I was picking up "bad mojo" from people on a daily basis...and it made me very ill. Almost everyone is a "taker" and not a "giver". I don't mind when people take, in fact I love helping and giving (it feels great!) but if someone doesn't ever reciprocate...and they're always taking...they can go elsewhere.
If someone I love is having a bad day, I already know before they call me. I'll suffer through the same anxiety attack or problem they're having miles away. I've learned that whenever I get antsy, angry, or whatever usually something with a loved one is happening or a natural disaster is about to happen...and I've been 7:7 now. I'll share a little story, or two :)
A few years back my mother and I were visiting my sister and her childhood friend in D.C. We decided to go see "Magic Mike" (don't judge, haha...) at the mall and eat some Italian appetizers afterwards. Upon leaving the theater my mood changed and something didn't feel right (mind you, I'm not moody by nature). People were acting "spacey" in my mind and the overall feeling of the place began to change. "Something feels weird. Something isn't right." I announced at the dinner table above the neighboring table's voices. "Yeah, you're right. Something is off..." my mother and sister agreed. Even "Dee" my mother's friend, a huge skeptic, agreed that she felt a little strange. "We should head home." I proposed. And so we drove back to my sister's place. Within 15 minutes of getting home a transformer blew outside, the sky darkened and a very severe storm hit the city and coastline that we were not expecting. People lost power, some died, and it lasted for days. People fighting over a shortage of ice, water, and food. I've had more severe reactions with Haiti, earthquakes or tsunamis. Animals can sense when storms are coming...is that weird that some humans can too? My mom's friend doesn't like to believe in this sort of phenomena, and had a hard time explaining how we "knew"...she even felt it!
I can also sense when something bad is going to happen...something I used to ignore in high school but now I honor and respect. I learned the hard way. I can sense when trouble is coming, if I am to be injured by someone, or when someone is going to be a problem later. For example, a few weekends ago I was at a party for a friend. I felt that something bad was going to happen that night but wanted to assume I was wrong. I even had suspicions about a particular person but ignored it. Later that night, he grabbed a kitchen knife and went downstairs to stab someone. No one else saw him grab the knife, and although I don't think he would've really followed through with stabbing someone, I flew down the stairs and ripped it out of his hands. Mind you, this is not someone from our friend group, I don't know this person...but somehow I felt his energy that night - erratic, violent, and nervous energy. It paid off watching him like a hawk that evening.
Or the time when I woke up and knew my mother would be in trouble that day. We were working on flipping a house in Dearborn. She was alone with a local guy she had hired (him and I did not get along nicely because he knew I could read his true intentions - ripping her off and using her). I got in the car and drove down there quickly. Low and behold he was high as a kite and also invited over (assuming we wouldn't be there) a crack-smoking prostitute that was at least six feet tall and 250lbs in a red spandex jumpsuit named "Ruby." Ruby was a linebacker by birth. I informed mom that I was grabbing an iron skillet to hit someone over the head with unless she called the cops. ;) Ruby went in the back room to do drugs and I lost it. Thankfully that day got resolved and eventually "Tony" or "Roy" (you pick because he had two names...shady, much?) ended up in jail for various reasons and I called to make sure his release wasn't within the next year. Who else gets "stabbed at a family picnic" with someone by a "spork"?!? Rather a drug deal went badly...what a mess. I've got hundreds of stories! :)
Being an empath can come in different forms (physical, emotional, intuitive, etc.) and can be extremely helpful...if you choose to grow it and honor it. But it also seems so overwhelming...until you learn to turn it on and off. It's not fun looking someone in the eyes and beginning to "read" them, or being physically near people and feeling their different moods, or being at home happy and content but then your family member is having a meltdown so you're going to experience it too, involuntarily. It sucks!
But! There is hope :)
So what is the point of all these ramblings? Apparently 1 in 20 people are empaths, or about 5% of the population. 95% of the population do not sense these things. However, ANYONE can develop their intuition if they choose to do so. It is just like a muscle. And if you meditate, eat a healthy diet, avoid substances and alcohol, decalcify your pineal gland (take spirulina and fermented cod liver oil, avoid heavy metals and fluoride for starters) train your intuition...you can become quite fantastic about "tuning in". Being tuned in can be a wonderful gift and tool to use in your life...I use it in various ways. Helping to counsel people, connecting deeply with clients, or even in marketing or investing in concepts. I can sense what will trend! Haha! No it's not like Rain Man...and I don't think it works on the lottery ;)
Essentially, I am looking forward to being able to turn it off and on, instead of walking about with my third eye open all the time in the world. Talk about overwhelming! Have any cool psychic, intuitive or empathic stories to share? Mother's/women's intuition? Share below in the comments if you like! :)
"I tried to race against time. I tried to race against death.
I hurried the holidays and I rushed our gatherings,
Terrified if we waited, it would be too late.
Thanksgiving and Christmas decorations came on November 11th, not the 27th. I didn't care, I was proud to host for him and my family. I tried to cram in as many fun events as possible, hoping it would give purpose for a longer life for him. By Christmas he was in the hospital, I rode in the ambulance with him to hospice. Proud to protect him and keep him company like his guard dog. I watched him doze in and out; he kept forgetting why he was there every few minutes.
Death feels selfish, but so am I. I don't want to lose my loved one but I also know this isn't quality of life. I must learn to say goodbye to him in the flesh, but I know he'll be around in spirit.
Sometimes I forget I am just a human. That I can't beat death, no one can. Death isn't something we can race, outsmart or hide from. It is something we must all face whether we like it or not.
I know he will be going to an amazing place, living on after his physical death...I wish others knew this truth. I have seen glimpses of the other side, I even left my body during an operation and saw an angel or what looked like Jesus. I have encountered spirits, I have seen. I know goodbye is not forever."
***
I wrote the above the night my Great Uncle Charles was supposed to pass away. I received a call from my mother notifying me that hospice expected him to die that evening in a matter of hours. He was like a grandfather to me, the only man who was there my entire life with love and support. My mother and grandma stayed the night there, keeping him company. His breathing was labored and tortuous to watch. I demanded to drive down in the dark that night but they insisted I wait until morning. I feared he would pass away before I got to say goodbye but I resigned myself to waiting until morning. Oddly, I forgot to set my alarm that morning, I had cried myself to sleep, but was awoken by a random text message from someone around 5 a.m.
I woke up to my phone and hurried to pack up my belongings and dogs. Only three days prior I had a surgery that rendered me unable to lift anything over 15-30lbs for several weeks. How was I going to get the bulldogs in the car?!? I prayed to God to help me get the 60lb. bulldogs into the car. By the grace of God I somehow lifted those beefy sausages into the car, despite being in agony. :) I hurried down state - I was racing against death it felt like. The entire way down there I kept trying to tell my Uncle's spirit to wait until I got there to pass away. I wanted to be there for him, and to help console my grandmother and mom. I had no idea if he could receive that type of message telepathically, but I prayed the divine would help intervene. "Please God, don't let him go yet!"
It's about a good 3.5 - 4 hour drive from my house down to where Uncle was in hospice. I hurried to drop the dogs off at my mother's and raced over to his care center. Up the elevator I went with mom and down the winding halls, passing the elderly who sat there confused and disoriented. I saw my Uncle's name on the familiar door and we entered. Horror was painted across my grandmother's face, "I think he's already passed!" The nurses were checking his heart for what seemed like minutes. "I still hear a faint heartbeat...I'll give you a few minutes." This was it.
We knelt beside his bed and held his frail body as Uncle began his departure to the other side. My mother, grandma, and I took turns telling him how much we loved him, that we were sorry and would miss him dearly, and our thank-you's for his exceptional generosity and for being a huge part of our lives. "Go into the light, Uncle," my mother said. I raised my head to see if he was still with us. His eyes were now distant; no longer bright and sparkling with a soul. His breathing had stopped - he had gone to the other side. His "shell" of a body lay there. It was over.
Death isn't an aesthetically beautiful thing, but knowing your loved one is in a better place and free from suffering is bittersweet despite seeing something so horrible.
Some people don't believe in "divine timing" or the spiritual world, but I do - with every fiber of my being. I believe my uncle's spirit waited for me to cross over, which means the world to me. What are the odds that he would pass later than expected and within those few seconds that I arrived? That someone would text me and wake me up exactly when I needed to be awake to arrive in time? He also was able to give us some other spiritual "signs" to let us know he's okay on the other side. I have seen so many things that are considered "paranormal" or "spiritual" in my life that I could never deny the existence of such a powerful force - God and the spiritual world is very much real but also very discrete sometimes. Spirit is quiet...but if you listen and you look for it, you will find it.
After he passed my mother and I sat outside. We saw and heard sandhill cranes. I made mention of it as I often notice totems and animal "signs". "I heard them last night too when I was outside praying to God about Uncle!" mom informed me. We got back in the car and on a brochure, sitting in the cup holder, was a sandhill crane...We got home and there were sandhill cranes sounding into the woods...I found an SD card on the ground while walking in the park with my grandma, mom, and sister days later. Somehow it was still readable by the computer and guess what pictures were on it? Sandhill cranes! I saw a few friends for drinks before leaving and guess what came up in conversation on their own behalf? Sandhill cranes! Coincidence? I took it as a sign. Sandhill cranes represent immortality and good fortune...the message Uncle's spirit was so desperately trying to tell my grandmother despite their religious upbringing. "I am okay! I am in the spiritual world but I am still with you" is how I interpreted it.
One my good friends and gifted "readers" (check out www.angelwords.com) was kind enough to give my mother a spiritual message that night he passed away. Apparently Uncle unexpectedly made contact with her (they had never met before) and made sure to mention that he would give us a sign that he was okay in the form of hearing a small bell ring. And guess what?!?...
We had the visitation on Thursday and the funeral on Friday. Casterline Funeral Home in Northville has some of the nicest people on earth running the business! They have buried almost all of my family for generations so we are pretty close with them...in addition to my Uncle and mother owning a cemetery back in the day; we're familiar with the line of work and the associates. Apparently they had just put in a new lighting system a year ago with bulbs that last typically for 20 years. During both days for Uncle's visitation and funeral, a specific light kept turning on and off. On Friday a second bulb began doing weird patterns as well. The director later informed us that she never had this happen at a funeral there. One of Uncle's friends stated that the lights turning on and off was Uncle trying to say hello. Both she and her son heard my uncle call her name later that night in her home and yet "no one" was there. But there was more...
Friday was more difficult...perhaps because there was an air of "finality" about that day. It was the day we would put Uncle to rest in the ground, the conclusion of his lifetime. My sister and I did our best to read personal letters we wrote for Uncle out loud in front of those in attendance. We would be followed by a singer we hired for the ceremony, something I knew that would be beautiful but would kill me emotionally...I always lose it at funerals when people sing. During the singer's performance, clear as day, a small distinct bell sound rang out into the room and several of us looked at each other in confusion but also amazement. Was that Uncle? We sat and listened to the rest of the service, as not to distract or cause a scene. I figured it might have been someone's phone but wanted to believe it was Uncle.
Later we sat at his burial site, surrounded by our deceased family. I visited my grandfather's grave to say hello and placed a rose on his stone. I felt our loved ones with us in spirit, they were there to help support. "Amazing Grace" was sung for the service and I quietly fell apart into pieces. But my woes were again paused when very clearly another small bell sound broke the air. There was no logical reason for the bell sound - everyone's phone was off, no one was in that direction, the tent that we sat under was not clinking together on the metal poles...we had no explanation. My family and I were amazed again.
Ironically, or divinely, the singer came to talk with my mother and I after the service was over and we carried on a random conversation. All of a sudden the director joked about firing him for "that bell sound" during his singing and I immediately interrupted them. "We all heard that!" I exclaimed. "Yeah it was my computer's email notification, which is impossible because I turned off the internet on my computer but somehow a notification came through the speaker system and computer, and caused that bell sound. I am so sorry!" "No, please don't be. That means more than you know." We explained what our friend and psychic/medium had informed us. He was very intrigued. "I've never had that happen before, and I am always very strict about turning off the internet and all programs on my computer. I don't know how that's possible."
So, am I crazy for believing in the spiritual? I don't think I am, especially when that many spiritual things happened in 48 hours... :)
I've written a previous post about gratitude...and how important it is to have gratitude even when you're in the poopiest of times and tribulations. When you don't have gratitude, and instead complain, worry, or embody other negative habits, you can actually create more problems. The universe will respond and teach you even harder lessons. When you're not grateful the universe will stop providing and you will see just how bad things can really get...
As hard as it may be, don't grow your issues into something bigger.
But anywho! I had an amazing dream that I was so excited about when I woke up. Over the years I have taken the time to practice remembering my dreams, taken the time to meditate on them and I write them down in the morning. I love looking back on my dreams to see if anything matched and often these "premonitions" and symbols are very accurate.
I'll get to my dream in a minute but I remember part of my dream, in another "segment", was discussing how being a healer, we often lose part of our longevity/life here on earth. That the more people we heal, the more we expire a bit earlier. I found it ironic as there is evidence that linked healers, psychics, mediums, and empaths with early health problems, death, disease, etc. I think it is because we absorb other people's energy and woes, if not properly cleared, it can become a problem.
Anyways here is my cool dream!
"There were all these family problems going on (currently accurate with illness). My family was complaining, worrying, and other negative behaviors regarding the current state of affairs and tribulations. I was at my mother's house and we were both outside by the driveway. There was this huge, beautiful red bird sitting by the dinner bell in the berm/trees that caught my attention. It looked like a red macaw but the end of its tail curled and faded into an iridescent and gorgeous maroon, purple, and grey (P.S. I like the British way of spelling grey, it looks more natural, ha). I knew what this bird was - it was sacred. I asked my mom what the common name of the bird was, as my mom is great with identifying birds. "Frosted Mandrake" or a "Smoking Mandrake" is what my mom told me its name was.
To everyone else this bird was as common as a cardinal, blue bird, and so on. Ordinary?!? No one seemed to know what it was and the powers it had - it was a phoenix! In my dream, this rare mythological bird actually lived amongst people, but humans had no idea that it was the legendary phoenix and thus no one appreciated it. I approached the phoenix and he flew over to the porch a short distance away and watched me. I approached him again and he flew upwards, as if testing me to see how far I would follow and if I was dedicated. I called to the phoenix with a whistle and he returned. I had my arms outstretched towards him and the sky, and he came and picked me up.
Despite being the size of a macaw, this bird had incredible strength and was able to carry me - easy-peasy. The phoenix rescued me and took me away from the problems. I held on to its legs and talons as we soared (hell yea lol). I remember adjusting my hands to hold the phoenix better so I wouldn't fall to the earth, and between his very sharp talons I felt these incredible soft and warm pads that he held me with. The phoenix was nurturing and not just some bird of prey. The bird took me back to its huge nest that had other phoenixes there. They weren't offpsring but were other adult birds; it was more of a community nest than a maternal nest. I remember all of them looking at me as I stepped into/onto the nest that was past the cloud line; confused as to why a human was up there but I was welcomed. I don't remember what happened or what I experienced there but then I was back on earth at a house somewhere and my sister was telling me she had a dream I died. I apologized to her but I was so excited about this encounter.
I researched "smoking mandrake" and realized it was a literal reference. Shamans, healers, witches, and so on would smoke mandrake root for spiritual experiences although without proper dosing it can be dangerous. I've always had an infinity for the folklore and story of the mandrake plant (how it was almost a human) let alone plant medicine and shamanism.
Sometimes I will have dreams that a shaman or healer will come to me in my sleep and will give very specific instructions for me. "You are an animal empath, go heal animals at the shelter." "Take mandarin leaf extract" and other weird things that I didn't even know existed or were possible prior to my dream. Am I going to go smoke some mandrake root because of a dream? Probably not, but I'd be open to it ;) I still want to go back to Peru for a ceremony and cleanse/heal myself one of these days! Until then, I figured you guys might find this interesting! Any interpretations of the dream you'd like to share? Post it in the comments! :)
